Monday, October 17, 2011

NBA Lockout Cinema

If the NBA lockout was a movie, then which one would it be?

The Sopranos
On Part One of Friday's HEATcast, Alfredo Arteaga said the NBA owners' compromises during collective bargaining remind him of a scene from the Sopranos when Tony was negotiating with Phil Leotardo. 

Pulp Fiction
Last week Larry Coon, author of the, retweeted a comparison of the NBA lockout and the restaurant robbery in Pulp Fiction: Robbers (Owners) Customers (Fans) Sam Jackson (Players) Case (53%). System issues like the luxury tax, salary cap exceptions and length of contracts are Sam Jackson's "Bad Motherfucker Wallet".

An analogy on Part Two of Friday's HEATcast compared the lockout to the "fuck you, pay me" scene from Goodfellas.

So the NBA got 10 new owners as partners since the last lockout. Any financial problems, the NBA can go to these new owners.

Trouble financing NBA offices around the globe? They can call the new owners. 

Trouble funding investment in digital properties for marketing? They can call the new owners.

But now the NBA's gotta come up with the owners' profit every year, no matter what, because they borrowed so much money to pay the NBA's inflated franchise prices. 

Malice in the Palace? Fuck you, pay me. 

Low NBA Finals ratings after Michael Jordan's retirement reduced the TV revenue? Fuck you, pay me. 

Global recession, huh? Fuck you, pay me.

And finally, when the owners can't borrow another dollar from the league's credit facility to cover their paper losses, what do they do? They lock the players out and blow up the season.

How Does It End?
If the federal mediator cannot broker an agreement between the NBA and NBPA, then how will this stalemate end? It will probably end the way it began — like a scene from The Boondocks.

It's just a matter of whether both sides will just knock each other unconscious...

...or kill each other in the crossfire between themselves, the agents and the Feds.

Maybe I've seen too many movies...

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