Saturday, February 25, 2012

Week 10 Eastern Conference Fanalyst Rankings: Trade Rumors Edition

The biggest date on the NBA calendar after All-Star Weekend is the trade deadline and it's the last chance teams have to improve themselves enough to become the best in their conference. This week's Fanalyst Rankings highlight the trade rumors surrounding the best eight teams in each conference.

The worksheet below lists the trade rumors from and for the last two weeks.

There are two sides to every NBA Power Ranking: the Fanalytical and the Fanatical. As a Miami HEAT blogger living on the east coast, MHI played the Eastern Conference fanalyst for games thru Friday. As a Denver Nuggets fan living west of the Mississippi River, Mrs. NBA played the fan and provided the slander. The roles are reversed for the Western Conference Rankings.

1. Miami HEAT (27-7, Last Week #1)
MHI: HEAT have the best schedule-adjusted efficiency differential in the NBA (points scored minus points allowed per possession based on strength of schedule) and should go 3-0 after All-Star Weekend, but their streak of double-digit blowouts may end in Utah on the second night of a back-to-back. It would be easier for the HEAT to keep the blowouts going if they had a center to help them on the glass, but there are no recent trade rumors for them.

Mrs. NBA: YAWWWNNNN! While I am glad the Heat ousted the Knicks, glad is an understatement. It was orgasmic to see the whiny NYK fans on twitter eat crow, but the Heat are a bore. They need an Asian point guard… or an Uncle Rico. Heck, even a Kendrick “I’m a fake tough guy” Perkins would be aight.

2. Chicago Bulls (27-8, Last Week #2)
MHI: Bulls have the second-best schedule-adjusted efficiency differential in the NBA, but could go 2-2 after the All-Star break with tough road games at San Antonio (second night of a back-to-back) and Philadelphia. Trade rumors had Derrick Rose requesting the Bulls trade Carlos Boozer’s contract for Pau Gasol’s but Rose denied them. Bad move by Rose because Pau’s worth at least an extra win for the Bulls and even more if Tom Thibodeau could play him in the fourth quarter.

Mrs. NBA: Of course the Bulls are #2, there isn’t a team that comes close. However, just having an Uncle Rico on their team should be enough to earn that #1 spot. UNCLE RICO. UNCLE RICO. UNCLE RICO.

3. Atlanta Hawks (20-14, Last Week #3)
MHI: Hawks went 2-3 in their last 5 games against the toughest schedule in the East. They should go 2-1 next week with the Warriors, Bucks and Thunder coming to Atlanta. Recent rumors said Marvin Williams wants to be traded, but that doesn’t help the Hawks unless teams like the Lakers or Timberwolves (that need a small forward) will trade them Pau Gasol or Nikola Pekovic’s contract.

Mrs. NBA: WAIT!! You left out the part where they LOST TO THE FUCKING KNICKS!!!! Do you hate Asians???? Do you not like egg rolls?? Do you hate white rice too??? 

MHI: Yeah, I'm a brown rice kinda guy. It's healthier.

4. Philadelphia 76ers (20-14, Last Week #4)
MHI: Sixers went 0-5 against the second-toughest schedule in the East over the last five games (according to The losing streak should end in Detroit on Tuesday and the Sixers can gut out a 3-1 week if they beat the Bulls at home on Sunday. Beating the best offensive rebounding team in the league would be a lot easier if Rod Thorn, President of Basketball Operations, makes the rumored trade for a big man.

Mrs. NBA: FUNNNYYYY!!! You STILL, even with a tough schedule, give the Sixers 4th place with 5 STRAIGHT losses!?!?! Interesting… interesting indeed.

5. Indiana Pacers (21-12, Last Week #5)
MHI: Pacers have fourth-best schedule-adjusted efficiency differential in the East, but stay in the fifth spot because they got it by going 4-1 against the easiest schedule in the conference over the last five games. Trade rumors say that Larry Bird will make a deal to get the team over the minimum salary cap and maybe that will get them over the hump in the East. Pacers are only 5-7 against teams in the East Fanalyst Rankings.

Mrs. NBA: Wake me up when they make it past the first round. Zzzzzzzzzzz.

6. New York Knicks (17-18, Last Week #6)
MHI: Linsanity got invited to All-Star Weekend, but the all-stars put an end to it last week. The Knicks should split the point guard battles against Kyrie Irving and Rajon Rondo waiting for them next week. Perhaps the most incredible thing Jeremy Lin accomplished was finally quieting the trade rumors that swirled around the Knicks the last two seasons, but they still don’t have enough talent to be a title contender.

Mrs.NBA: You barely mention Lin-Sanity AGAIN, MHI!!!!! Lin would whoop your behind in a little basketball and CALCULUS!!! WHY DO YOU HATE THE HARVARD GRAD?!?!?!? Have you been food poisoned by a Chinese/Japanese restaurant. WHO HURT YOU!?!?!?!

7. Boston Celtics (15-17, Last Week #7)
MHI: Celtics are clinging to the eighth-best schedule-adjusted efficiency differential by less than half-a-point over the Milwaukee Bucks. If they don’t go 2-2 after the All-Star break, then it will be their last appearance in the Fanalyst Rankings until they put together a two-week winning streak or Danny Ainge makes a trade to improve the team’s rebounding and get them easy points going to the basket. Only the Nets take less shots inside 10 feet.

Mrs. NBA: I have two words: BEN. GAY.

8. Orlando Magic (22-13, Last Week #8)
MHI: Magic posted the second-best schedule-adjusted efficiency differential in the East over the last five games of the Dwight Howard farewell tour. Based on the recent trade rumors, the best deal for the Magic would be whatever unveils itself behind the mystery doors of the three- or four-team deal the Nets are putting together. Either way, Otis Smith should be fired.

Mrs. NBA: This team is hanging on to Dwight Howard’s coattails…

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